Stovetop Diplomat

The Bruh-faletta

The Bruh-faletta

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Conceivably the king of sandwiches, the Bruh-faletta is thick-sliced mozzarella, bacon, olive tapenade, pickled onions and bell peppers, tomato and arugula piled decadently into a hoagie roll. It’s one of the best reasons to get out of bed in the morning.

This recipe didn’t begin as a blog post. We sort of stumbled onto this one – a sandwich so great it felt criminal not to share it. I would say a similar thing happened with my Riviera sandwich recipe, but I didn’t create that idea. Subculture– my favorite sandwich shop in the fair city of Denver- did that. But not unlike that recipe, I feel somehow obligated to spread the word. Sandwiches stir up that kind of feeling in me I guess.

Now of course, if followed from start to finish as a recipe, this is a VERY elaborate sandwich. Do I expect you to actually do everything in this recipe? No. That really would be so much work. This recipe is a great way to use up leftover olive tapenade- any kind will do! It also works great with any kind of pickled vegetables or even giardiniera. I have included recipes for both but they’re not obligatory!

Speaking of those delicious little pickled red onions and bell peppers, I am officially recommending that you add a jar of these to your life as a pantry staple. They have so many useful and delicious applications. The recipe I use here is basically the recipe from Cookie and Kate with the addition of bell peppers. I have included my version as part of this recipe, but theirs is definitely the original. I have made several people, including my sister (shoutout to Eva!) converts to this delicious condiment; we’ve both gotta keep them around at all times. Like I said above with the olive tapenade, this recipe is also a great way to use up leftover pickled onions and peppers!

I’d also like to make a quick note about the mozzarella. Be sure to use fresh mozzarella from a log or ball; NOT the kind of thin-sliced mozzarella you find in the deli for sandwiches. If not already sliced, be sure to slice your cheese thick – this provides the real bulk of the sandwich. I would say it provides the “meat” but of course the bacon is sort of responsible for that. That’s why this sandwich rules.

All glory goes to Mr. Diplomat for naming this one. The Bruh-faletta? What a work of art. And as for anyone actually reading this part of the blog: you’re a good person. You deserve to make yourself this sandwich.

The Bruh-faletta

Conceivably the king of sandwiches, the Bruh-faletta is thick-sliced mozzarella, bacon, olive tapenade, pickled onions and bell peppers, tomato and arugula piled decadently into a hoagie roll. It's one of the best reasons to get out of bed in the morning.

Course Main Course, Snack
Prep Time 30 minutes
Servings 2 sandwiches

Ingredients

For Pickled Vegetables and Onions:

  • 1 red bell pepper
  • 1/2 red onion
  • 1/2 cup water
  • 1/4 cup white vinegar
  • 1/4 cup apple cider vinegar
  • 1 1/2 tbsp honey
  • 1 1/2 tsp sea salt
  • 1/4 tsp red pepper flakes

For Quick Tapenade:

  • 2.5 oz can sliced olives
  • 2 tbsp olive oil
  • 2 tsp white vinegar
  • 1/4 tsp oregano
  • 1/4 tsp thyme
  • 1/4 tsp rosemary
  • a few cranks pepper

For Sandwich:

  • 2 8-in hoagie rolls
  • 6-8 slices fresh mozzarella (from the log, not thin-sliced in the deli)
  • 6 thick-sliced pieces bacon
  • 4-6 slices tomato
  • handful of arugula
  • mayonnaise

Instructions

Prepare Pickled Bell Peppers and Red Onions:

  1. (Recipe via Cookie and Kate) The night before you plan to eat them, thinly slice your bell pepper and red onion. Place in a large glass mason jar.

  2. Bring the rest of the ingredients to a boil in a small pot. Once boiling, remove from heat and pour over the vegetables.

  3. Leave the jar uncovered and let it cool to room temperature. Cap tightly and place in the refrigerator until ready to use.

Prepare Quick Tapenade

  1. Drain the can of olives. Finely chop and place in a small bowl.

  2. Stir in the rest of the tapenade ingredients. Set aside until ready to use.

Assemble Sandwich:

  1. Slice hoagie rolls 3/4 of the way lengthwise, leaving one side still attached.

  2. Cook bacon to desired degree of doneness. I prefer to do this in the oven!

  3. Spread mayo on each side of your bread. Layer sandwich: sliced mozzarella, olive tapenade, bacon, pickled bell peppers and onions, tomato, arugula. Enjoy your life!

Currently Listening: Less than Jake – Silver Linings

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